HONOURING ALL OUR PARTS
Yesterday I had the pleasure of facilitating a session for LIMBO, the queer refugee project in Amsterdam that I am part of as a co-facilitator and space holder.
I introduced them to an adapted version of Virginia Satir’s “Parts Party” wherein we reflected on 6 different parts of ourselves:
parts that we love about ourselves
parts that others love about us,
parts that are easy for us/that show up with ease
parts that we want to grow or improve on
parts that we see as our weaknesses, and
parts that know and hold love (who or what are in your heart?)
The comments I heard from the participants were very interesting and similar to what I have heard from others when I facilitate a parts party. Most of the reflections revolve around the ease and difficulties with which they answered certain questions. For most of them, the weakness part was easiest to determine. Whereas it was challenging for them to write about the parts that they love about themselves and those that others love about them.
Parts we want to grow or improve on also made it to the easy list whereas parts that hold love stirred both nostalgia and hope. One participant shared her dream as one of the parts she hold dearly in her heart.
Take the time to reflect
Cut a piece of paper into 6 parts. You can do it organically or with a pair of scissors. Now think about each part. Write down what comes up for you (including images, metaphors, colours, sounds, gestures, and words).
How would your parts look like?
What is coming up for you?
What is resonating the most in your reflection?
What was easy to connect with?
What was difficult to answer?
Why was it easy or difficult?
How would your friends/partner/children/colleagues' parts look like?
Deepen with some aromatherapy
In the session, I added another layer to help them tune in with themselves even more. I asked them to choose from the essential oils that I brought an oil that represents one part. I gave each one a bottle to add their concoction (3 drops for each oil with jojoba oil as a carrier oil). After the session, they now have their unique blend of oils that represents their integrated parts!
A unique composition that represents wholeness and the parts in them.
You can only imagine the joy and enthusiasm they had as they shared their oil blends with other participants! (no pictures to share for privacy reasons).
The invitation that I shared with them during the harvesting of the session was to use the oil blend when they find themselves in need of reconnection to their integrated self.
Adaptation to this exercise:
If you don’t have an extensive collection of essential oils, you can also use images. Create a collage of images that represent these different parts.
You can also create your own logo or emblem to signify the different parts and how it support your wholeness.
You can also use audio - make a playlist of songs or sounds that represent each part.
Here is a poem that I wrote out of that exercise:
HONOURING ALL OUR PARTS
We are all made of parts
The parts of ourselves we love
The parts that are easy to show up
The parts that others love about us
The parts that long to grow
The parts that hold what and who are dear to us
There are parts of us that we dislike
Parts that we shun and do not get heard
Parts that have deep resentments
Parts that carry deep sorrow
Parts that can’t let go
We have in us parts that know of hope
Parts that yearn for love
Parts that speak of justice
Parts that cry out of anger
And in this parts-filled lives we learn
To face each part and hold them dearly
To give each part a space to be held
To be cared for, to be seen
Each part of us are valid
They speak of long held beliefs
Of expectations we have of ourselves
And those from others around us
Of the roles we fill in
And of the dreams we keep alive
All parts of us bring wisdom
Of what our systems are seeking
Of congruence
Of harmony
Of balance
Of integration
We are all made of parts
Like an ecosystem within an ecosystem
Each part different
Each part vital
Each part holy
And as we heal
We learn to care for the parts of us
That we haven’t yet learned to love
My dear,
If you do decide to try this exercise, I hope you have others to do it with. Creating brave spaces for internal explorations such as this can be tender and vulnerable. Having someone to do this with not only creates opportunities to have a mirror reflected on us, but it also provides the safety in which we can dig deeper into our truths with care from those around us.
Hiraya manawari,
Lana
Looking forward to a parts party at Summercamp this year 🫶🏻